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j.a. kazimer 

I know, right? Spending your day making shit up. How can that possibly be a job? If only writing was that  easy. It takes alot of time and energy, not to mention a lot of lies. But I wouldn't want to be anything else. Okay, that's a lie too. I'd kill to be a secret agent.

With a master's degree in psychology, you really have three options. Option 1) Serial Killer, Option 2) Barista at your local coffee shop, and since drinking too much coffee makes me want to stab someone with a swivel straw, I picked option 3) Writer.

I often regret only being allowed to stab people on paper.

The Junkie Tales and a novel called Dope. Sick. Love (not yet sold) were both written while I was finishing up my degree and still working as a private investigator. The mood of both books fit my life and mood at the time. Those books were a means to understand the world I lived in daily. Now, my life is very different, so my writing reflects that. Plus, killing Cinderella was so oddly satisfying, I had to do it again and again with other fairytale legends. 

I'm a sucker for Cinderella. I must've read that Disney book a million times as a kid (okay, my parents read it too me. I didn't know how to read yet. Give me a break). So when I decided to write a book about a villain who has to go against his villainous nature my first act was to murder Cinderella. It seemed fitting somehow. 

*Warning, lame academic answer*

Fairytales are a barometer of society. A way to check our moral bearings. They have a very real moral lesson and often a gory outcome to those who break the code. For example, in Cinderella, the lesson is, besides the obvious if you don't want to scrub toilets for the rest of your life you should marry well, to treat others as you wish to be treated. Along with plenty of other more minor lessons. But you get my point. In today's world, we are too often challenged by 'doing the right thing' so the reemergence of fairytales is a way to get back to our morality roots. Plus, they're just cool. Have you watched GRIMM? I mean, come on.

Another reason for fairytales recent popularity is the 200th anniversary of the Brothers Grimm's first fairytale collection Kinder- und Hausmärchen being published in 1812.

F word? What f word? Did someone swear on my title?

Let me start by saying, I THOUGHT OF IT FIRST!!!! That being said, I love how swearing has become a greater part of our vernacular. No one should ever fear words. Just the motives behind them. US Today had a great article on this trend not too long ago.

Here’s the standard line: Work hard and learn your craft. Beyond that, practice being a working writer. Go to conferences. Join critique groups. Learn the ins and outs of publishing. It’s not an easy road. There are over 400,000 books published a year, and that’s not including indie or ebooks books. Make your book stand out. Make yourself standout. 

A tiny fairy sprinkles dust over my keyboard and magic happens. Or so I wish. In truth, I’m a terrible procrastinator. I write rarely, and would rather waste my day on facebook or surfing the web than writing. I can’t wait until I’m rich enough to hire a ghostwriter. 

No. I’m lucky if I write every week. But when the words come, they come, and it's like nothing else. 

I sit down, crack my knuckles, and start typing. I’m a seat of the pants kind of writer. I don’t outline and just free write. It works for me, but I often write myself into corners and likely make my job harder than it needs to be. 

Depends on what my editor says. I can usually get a clean draft in about 4 revisions. And then there’s the thousand or so rounds more with the editor. Okay, that’s an exaggeration, but it often feels like that. 

The answer to your question, silly. But if what you're wondering is, what is my current project? Well, I'm finishing up on the second book in the F**ked Up Fairy Tale series featuring the Frog Prince and Sleeping Beauty. And thinking about starting the third featuring Goldilocks. 

Short answer: I spent ten years working at it day and night.

Really long one: I’m going to tell you a secret that the publishing industry doesn’t want you to know. Are you ready? Got a pen and paper handy? Publishing is hard. And here’s another secret, I’m not that great of a writer. Oh, don’t get me wrong. I’m one heck of a storyteller, but my prose is full of grammatical errors, fragments sentences and all sort of other broken craft. I suck at exposition and description, fear iteration, and break out in hives at the thought of closed third person POV. And yet, I’m still sitting up here today. So why her and not me, you might be asking and/or grumbling to yourself? The thing is, I never gave up. I was so close, so many times. 1000 rejections on 5 books, and I still wrote a sixth. Signed with an agent, and yet, no sales. Got an editor interested in a book, but it was turned down at the editorial board. So being the kind of person who needs to be smacked in the face with a shovel eight times instead of just seven, and with my sixth book in hand, I signed up for the Colorado Gold conference, and spent the best 50 bucks of my life by adding on the extra three hour editor workshop with Peter Senftleben.

The day of the workshop arrived, and myself and eight other writers sat around a table while the editor, Peter critiqued our projects. The first few got off relatively easy, with no tears or bloodshed. But the lower he got in the stack of novels, the darker the critiques became. My eyes caught sight of my manuscript, at the very bottom, looking ripe for destruction. An hour later, he pulled out my manuscript. Rather than rip it apart as I’d anticipated, he mentioned a few revision suggestions and asked some questions. I answered as best I could and took plenty of notes. When he returned my manuscript following the workshop, there was a note at the top, please email me a full. Being neurotic, I emailed it to him that very night, at 4 am, after making his requested revisions. Then I waited. About two weeks later, he emailed me, saying, ‘I love it, but it’s rough.’ Then he asked me my thoughts for a second book in the series. I pulled some vague storyline out of the air, and sent it off with an apology and a promise to polish the rough spots. Two weeks after that, on October 20, 2010, my phone rang. It was Peter, and a two-book deal with an option on a third. Curses! A F**ked Up Fairytale will be released in March of 2012 with the second book in the series coming out in 2013.

Yes. Her name is Sharon Belcastro. Her website is: http://www.belcastroagency.com/

Oh, I have a ton. Perhaps my greatest author crush is on Christopher Moore. He's so funny and makes up the oddest characters and tales. Really, who would of ever thought to retell bible stories through the eyes of Christ's immoral friend? Or write a funny remake of Shakespeare. I'm also a huge fan of many mystery authors like Harlan Coben, romance authors like Julie Garwood and Susan Elizabeth Phillips, and Spec fiction types like Mario Acevedo. As a writer, my job is mostly to read. To know what other writers do well and copy them like crazy! 

Sure. Why not? I'll make sure to add you to page 57. 

Yeah, right. I figured it out once and I make about 2 cents a day. 

Of course. I love my fans and would do anything to keep you happy. Now, can I borrow a couple hundred bucks?